top of page

Happy Holidays...It's Vacation Time!

meemiekempercoachi



Vacations are meant to provide time to rest, relax and rejuvenate.
But is that your reality???

My family is visiting….my daughter, son-in-law and 3 year old grandson. It feels a bit like a whirlwind that starts the moment our “little” wakes up and doesn’t end until he is in bed for the night! We wake up, play, make breakfast, play some more, make lunch, try to get out of the house for an activity, come back, make more food, play (with the now tired “little” who is fussy and harder to please), then finally get him to bed. Whew.

 

Of course, there are many, many joyful moments mixed in; the delight of playing games, of solving mysteries together, of making puzzles, racing monster cars, and experiencing his first time on skis.We often get caught up in simply surviving our time with our children; survivingthe challenges they bring to our lives: feeding them, sleep routines, potty training, sibling conflicts, big emotions, tantrums, talking back, disrespect, screen time, homework….the list goes on and on!


But if you are like me, you may feel a bit unfulfilled (and/or exhausted). And there are many days of "vacation" to go….

So, I got curious about the root of my dissatisfaction. Could it be an unmet need? I am getting lots of time with my family to meet my belonging need. My power need is a little compromised (the agenda is definitely not up to me….) but I meet it by providing food and a comfy home for everyone to stay in. I am getting lots of sleep and am eating (mostly) healthy food. So what’s missing? My personal freedom is a bit compromised as I find myself doing a lot of things “for the good of the group”. And that led me to the answer….what’s missing is time for myself. And I feel really guilty taking it. 


But I remind myself of what we all know: in order to be available as our best selves for others, we need to take care of our own needs. So….what to do?


I started brainstorming:

  • Get up early (to meditate, do yoga, sit by the fire with a cup of coffee, or go for an early morning walk)

  • Stay up after everyone is in bed (this works for us with a 3 year old, but might not in your home if you have teens and young adults around!!)

  • Take a “nap” midday–even just to have quiet time and read

  • Go grocery shopping alone (or Christmas shopping or window shopping)

  • Go to the gym for a workout

  • Retire to my room early to watch a movie or read before bed


Take a mental inventory of your needs and see if any of them could use some replenishing…remember, we need to be meeting ALL of our needs (Freedom, Fun, Love and Belonging, Power and Safety/Survival) to feel happy and fulfilled.

If you find all of your needs being met and you are feeling satisfied, rejoice! You are taking good care of yourself. 

 

And if not, can you take even a tiny step in the direction of fulfilling any unmet needs? 

 

The last two days I got up early, when the house was quiet, to do a yoga class. I didn’t make it through the entire hour, but I got a chunk of time to myself, and it did make a difference in my day! 

 

May you find ways to enjoy (and be fulfilled) during your vacation (and after)!

 

Happy holidays,

Meemie

 

P.S. As I reflected on this post, it also struck me that part of the solution is in how we look at (or approach) our activities. When I was in the kitchen cooking breakfast, I realized I was getting some pretty sweet alone time (the freedom I’ve been craving), doing something I really enjoy. In other words, changing how we think about things we are already doing is another way to create greater fulfillment!



2 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page